Jokes:

My wife and I were at a Comic-Con and they offered ten dollar time machine rides.  The fine print said no returns, so I said, “You go.”

I learned there’s no X in the Finnish alphabet. So, what does a Finn call his old girlfriend?  Oh, she and I?  [Wave off.]  We’re Finnish.  After that joke, I may be Finnish.   

My friend loves Kenny G.   She thinks it’s amazing he set a Guinness World record by playing the longest continuous note on his saxophone.  45 minutes. I said, “45 minutes?  That’s nothing.  When I flew to London the two-year old behind me held a continuous screech for six hours!”